Seeing the Dignity of the Poor

by John Predmore, SJ

Love for the poor is an essential element of Christianity, Judaism, Islam, and other faith traditions, and a moral imperative shared across cultures. Societies are often judged on how well they care for one another. We cannot regard poverty simply as a societal problem to be managed. The poor are not other; they are “us”, part of our family. Our concern cannot be reduced to another charitable activity. Rather, we are called to broaden our understanding and our relationships with those who are “one of us.”

The other day, I was talking with a middle-aged woman who was facing relationship challenges. Her boyfriend had been sending confusing signals, setting up distinct boundaries, and controlling some of her choices. She was feeling manipulated, which affected her self-esteem. After I listened to her, she asked for advice. I began to replay her life for her – the history of good choices she made, the trials she faced as a single mother, her hard and thankless career, the renovation of the house she bought, and her eventual care for her own well-being. She sat still and cried. No one had affirmed her life story in a way that allowed her to feel proud of herself. In that moment, she felt seen and known. She was no longer invisible. In hearing her life story in a new way, she was able to recognize her own strength and dignity, and she felt proud of what she had done.

What this woman experienced is what so many people long for but rarely receive. Loving attentiveness is the beginning of true concern for others. We have to see others, especially the poor, in their goodness and in the fullness of their life experiences. Too often, the dominant societal narratives characterize the poor and those who struggle as burdens or failures, and make their presence uncomfortable. Over time, this can lead us to see them as unworthy of our attention or respect. Our spiritual and moral traditions invite us not just to see the poor, but to know them. When we serve the poor, we must do so not out of necessity, but because they are individuals with dignity and beauty.

Learning to care in this way requires time. It invites us to offer loving attention, to listen with real interest, to stand by in difficult moments, and to choose involvement over superficial contact. Many people do not see the valiant lives they lead because society does not value who they are. When we hold up a mirror to someone striving, we can help them see their dignity. Our hope is that they can develop the courage to transform their situations with our loving support.

As someone who offers spiritual and retreat guidance, I recently reviewed my list of the many people who seek spiritual accompaniment. Of that three dozen or so, I only see two who would be considered poor, and I see them infrequently. The realization that I was not offering consistent care and accompaniment to those who might need it most unsettled me. I made a commitment to do better.

Many people, both within and beyond religious institutions, do not see spiritual direction or spiritual accompaniment as a resource. Some assume it is designed or reserved for the privileged or for those who want to explore religious convictions more deeply. Others feel unworthy of this support. Yet accompaniment is, at its core, about helping people tend to their spiritual or inner lives and recognize their dignity and worth. Through attentive presence, people learn to see themselves more clearly and to relate to others with greater compassion. We all need this kind of support, especially those who are vulnerable or living on the margins of society. We all have wisdom to offer, one borne of both struggle and hope.

This week, notice who is asking, directly or indirectly, to be seen. You need not try to fix or explain anything. Simply offer your presence. Listen. When we accompany one another with attentiveness and care, we become a witness to the sacred in every human being.

Father John Predmore, SJ, is a Jesuit Priest of the USA East province. He gives spiritual retreats using artistic and creative exercises. He paints with oils and watercolors and is a photographer.