By The Rev. Craig A. Phillips, Ph.D.

“Most things I worry about never happen anyway.”
Tom Petty’s “Crawling Back to You” from Wildflowers.

One of my favorite Tom Petty songs is “Crawling Back to You.” It is a love song, I suppose —but that’s complicated. Some people think the song is about depression and anxiety. Others believe it’s about loneliness and feeling lost. There are also those who find arcane meanings within the lyrics. The song was written by Tom Petty and produced by Rick Rubin, Tom Petty, and Mike Campbell. It was released on November 1, 1994, on the Wildflowers album, Tom’s most personal set of recordings.

The central meaning of “Crawling Back to You,” is found in the two stanzas that tell a story. It describes Tom’s excessive anxiety and worry. A partner keeps assuring him that he’s OK and that he need not be so anxious. Things will turn out fine. “Things will work out for you,” the partner says. “I will be there every step of the way to love and support you.”

How many people with depression, worry, or anxiety —or any one the three— have heard these words spoken to them.? When you suffer from anxiety, it is difficult to hear and accept assurances of others. After all, think of all the things that could go wrong — that is the burden of anxiety. If you suffer from anxiety, nothing can convince you that things will turn out fine. So, you fall away, neither trusting in yourself nor in the person offering to help you. Only when things get truly bad again do you come “crawling back” to your loved one. You hope that new words of assurance will help you this time. If only I could believe that what you say will turn out to be true. If only I could, as Petty sings, “believe in you. It’s all I want to do.”

Hey baby, there’s something in your eyes

Tryin’ to say to me

That I’m gonna be alright if I believe in you

It’s all I want to do.

I know what Tom is singing about because I have been a worrier all my life. The verse that really hits home to me is this one:

I’m so tired of being tired

Sure as night will follow day

Most things I worry about

Never happen anyway

These lyrics are sung in a soft, haunting and ethereal voice; it’s calming, but its churning with emotion. “Most things I worry about, never happen anyway.” Truer words have never been spoken. Tom, you hit the nail on the head. I sure do miss you.

Worry and anxiety are nothing new to the human experience. The topic is addressed one way or another in every religious tradition. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus addressed worry and anxiety head on. He told his followers not to worry about needless things. Instead, they should put their hope and trust in God and rely on God’s righteousness alone.

One of the most beautiful collects in the 1979 Episcopal Book of Common Prayer is almost never used. The date of Easter moves around each year. The season of Lent that precedes it has a fixed number of days. The church, therefore, observes a season flexible in length between the end of the Christmas Season (January 6th.) and Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent. In the Episcopal Church, this season is called “Epiphany. The term comes from the Greek word meaning “to appear” or be “made manifest.” In the Roman Catholic liturgical calendar, it is observed as “Ordinary Time.” Only when Easter Day falls on its latest possible date is the collect for the Eighth Sunday after the Epiphany read. That is unfortunate, as it is one of the most elegant and meaningful prayers in The Book of Common Prayer. [1]

The central clause of the collect focuses on our human anxieties and fears:

Preserve us from faithless fears and worldly anxieties, that no clouds of this mortal life may hide from us the light of that love which is immortal, and which you have manifested to us in your Son Jesus Christ our Lord…

We all know what worldly anxieties are about in one way or another from our own lives. But what exactly are “faithless fears”? In many ways, they are like the fears Tom Petty sings about in “Crawling Back to You.” They are the fears that never happen anyway. We spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about these fears, but they never take place. We have worried for nothing. For Christians these are the fears — what the collect calls the “clouds of this mortal life” —that overshadow the light of the love of God that is eternal, immortal, and everlasting.

When we focus only on our worries, we separate ourselves from the love of God. God is no further apart from us than God ever was. God is eternally present to each of us. In our fears and anxieties, we pull away from the love of God. This divine love desires to carry our burdens with us as a partner. It wants to share that burden and lift its heavy weight from us.

“I’m so tired of being tired,” Tom sings. It’s time to let go of the things we can’t do anything about. We should find support from the people who love us. In the New Testament, Christians are urged to “cast all your anxiety on [God], because [God] cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7). God will share your burden with you. And that is good news for your anxious soul.

[1]”Most loving Father, whose will it is for us to give thanks for all things, to fear nothing but the loss of you, and to cast all our care on you who care for us: Preserve us from faithless fears and worldly anxieties, that no clouds of this mortal life may hide from us the light of that love which is immortal, and which you have manifested to us in your Son Jesus Christ our Lord; who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever.  Amen.” The Book of Common Prayer, Church Publishing, 1979: 216-217.

Note: If you suffer from severe anxiety and depression, please talk to your doctor. There are therapies and medications that can help you. There is no magic pill to eliminate anxiety. Do what you can to find the help you need. You deserve it.

The Rev. Craig A. Phillips, Ph.D. is a retired Episcopal priest and Professor of Religion. He currently teaches as an adjunct Lecturer at St. Anselm College in Manchester, NH. His blog is at https://craigphillips.co, and his free Substack page, “Everyday Life: Flourishing in These Times,” is at https://craigphillips.substack.com.